The Bitch is Back...

I was reading over an e-mail I wrote to Mr. Nice 6 months ago (which I'm pasting at the bottom), and I suddenly realized how good life was when I still had a soul and a sense of humor. Miss those days.

But... we shan't dwell, not on Rex Manning day!

And after a long absence, I am back to blog. (Undoubtedly, I will put anyone who still reads my blog off when I don't blog for another very long absence, but I just couldn't blog when all I was going to do was complain!)

So, I have 10 minutes, and I'm gonna blog the shit outta y'all.

News with me

The thesis (tentatively titled "Shifting Sensibilities & the Gay Plague: Gay Artistic Responses to AIDS, 1985-1995") has fully taken over my life. I have like 60 pages -- the maximum -- and I'm still not even finished writing it. Forget the fact that I was scheduled to turn in a draft last Friday. Oh well, the first real draft isn't actually due until next Friday, I just need to get into gear.

Onto more interesting things! I am currently listening to Britney Spears's new album, In the Zone. It's hot, the song "Toxic" in particular makes my whole world just that much better.

I also write a column for the newspaper. Go to the Middlebury Campus website, and click on Features then "Pop Rocks" type in lbeard@middlebury.edu so you don't have to register. This week I talk about American Idol runner-up Clay Aiken, previous topics also have been Britney, Halloween costumes (admittedly not pop) and Justin, I think. It's hot.

The sad truth, however, is that I don't have much going on in my life than school, tap, Riddim, Campus and thesis. But I tell ya that Thrift Store Makeover gets done, and those dances get learned!

Oh yeah, I haven't gone to sleep before 3 am more than once in the last 2 weeks! I'm on crack, yay!

And I'm as big a faghag and tummy-rub slut as ever, so don't lose faith. Anxiously awaiting next semester when I'm taking 3 classes and NOT writing a thesis.

Hope to be back sooner rather than later.

Besitos!

The aforementioned e-mail

In response to your listenventory (like that? I just made it up!), I am currently listening to Nina Simone. I give credit to you specifically and England generally for giving me the gift that is Nina. As a matter of fact, I'm listening to "Mood Indigo" right now -- every time I listen to it I think about y'all's big-ass speakers and how we all sat silently listening to Nina tap the piano stopper in that amazing pause before she starts singing. God, what a diva! And it's perfect relief for my gay man tendencies.

So, if you've been reading the blog, you know about all the job drama that has recently permeated my life. Nothing is really fixed yet, but I got what looks like an internship offer for publicity at an independent music company, so that would be cool, too. I'm a bit disillusioned at the mo' (to borrow your very British contraction), but after a tearful conversation with my dad, he said that I could definitely just go to NYC and get a normal person job, so I appreciate that they support my desire to not be in Alabama.

Things are wrapping up here at Middlebury. I had 20 pages of papers due today at 5 p.m., and I pulled a ransacking all-nighter last night but I'm surprisingly untired currently. I'm also drinking some Malibu and Coke, which damn it I deserve! This weekend was replete with scandal. I have this boy that I'm in love with -- he's this shrimpy improv comedian guy who I'd wager I outweigh by a good 30 lbs, but love is blind as they say -- and he was in this student fashion show. I told him he looked fuckable -- whoops. No dice on that one. And then my roommate and I ended up bringing 2 boys back to our room for a very chaste and extended gab session until 6 a.m. I don't know if they wanted nookie or not, but it was definitely a change of pace for me... My life is one strange gallavantation (made up that word, too!) after another, I tells ya. Yeah, so I'm leaving Midd in a week, and it's absolute chaotic madness, but I'm still finding time to be uber social because I'm never gonna have these resources (reality TV, stressbuster movies, free pizza, etc.) again, so I might as well take advantage of them and realize that grades are not the ultimate pursuit of this short stay on earth.

Moving away from pseudo-philosophizing, I miss y'all so much! I keep thinking of things that I miss. For example, how y'all's picture is in the Lounge -- I miss the Lounge! I even miss Luke -- the boy that got away -- what the hell? I'm missing Laura a lot, too. I need to write her. I think I'm waiting from an e-mail from her technically, but I should grab the bull's balls, so to speak. What else do I miss? Sketchy-McSketcherstein LCR parties, British Buscemi and all the other poetry freaks, the ability to drink anywhere anytime, and a whole variety of other things.

My room is in 2 months and a week, though -- yay 21 years old! My parents might come to NYC and get me soused as all good parents should.

Let's see, what else is there of note? Not much to be honest. My life comes in ebbs and flows, which I think is normal. Imagine flow all the time -- eep. Even this woman ain't woman enough for that!

The next trip I am planning across the pond is for this Christmas with my mom. She wants to depose our annual NYC trip since I've been getting my fair share of time there and instead go to London, and you know I'm not gonna argue with Business Elite travel. Awhaw. That's still really far away, though, so I can't say for sure.

It's really great to hear that you're getting some entrepreneurial instincts. You are 'such a responsible young man' (I sound like a mother), and you'd be the hippest boss in town. I'd support your drinking establishment if I were ever in the right place at the right time.

But, I must run-run-run away to midnight breakfast in Proctor now. What good is studying for exams if you can't put it off by eating lots of donuts and consuming massive quantities of Mtn. Dew? I mean, really...

So tell everyone hi for me. Seriously, I wish my lives could converge and I could see y'all again because it's been far too long with nuttin to hold me over from my brief UEA experience. Write me back, and then I'll write you back and on and on, and we'll be pen pals -- it'll be hot! (riiiiight)

TTYL,
Lanford

P.S. I was gonna send you some photos, but I suddenly was struck by my own vanity, and I couldn't do it. Plus, I'm not what we call photogenic, so you can just rely on your own idealized image of my incomparable beauty! Kisses and hugs, young Jonathan...